


Pride

by MutantRiot



Category: X-Men - All Media Types
Genre: Canon Disabled Character, Charles Xavier in a Wheelchair, Disability, Gay Pride, Gender Identity, M/M, Mutant Pride, Other, Sex and Disability, Sexuality, Trans Erik Lehnsherr
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-14
Updated: 2020-07-14
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:55:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,010
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25253461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MutantRiot/pseuds/MutantRiot
Summary: This is Charles Xavier's first time at Pride, and he's afraid of feeling out of place because of his telepathy and disability. But everything changes when he makes the acquaintance of one of the founders of a local mutant support group, Erik Lehnsherr. Through their evolving relationship, Charles learns that his disability doesn't limit love and sex.
Relationships: Erik Lehnsherr/Charles Xavier
Comments: 3
Kudos: 26





	Pride

**Author's Note:**

> Just to be perfectly clear - this story DOES contain explicit sexual content <3

Charles always felt nervous when it came to pride, and this was the first year Hank had successfully convinced him to come along. It’s not that he was ashamed of his sexuality or anything, he was just used to hiding everything “different” about himself. He played the perfect son for his mother and stepfather, and the helpful, dutiful student (and now professor) at university, but he never felt like he could be loud and proud about being queer or a mutant. Even in his relationships, he’d felt that he needed to be a certain way… Past partners, including Moira, had expected that of him. But that relationship was behind him now, and he was on better terms with her and his life. He had finally agreed to go when Hank and Alex explicitly invited him and promised that they’d buy him a flag for the apartment. If he hated it, they said they’d never make him go again, which seemed fair and reasonable. 

“How do you like your wheels, Charles?” Alex asked as they crossed the street into the park. Even from the street, Charles could feel the sheer density of people in the area in his head. He’d probably get a headache from all this; hopefully it’d be worth it. 

“I love them, guys, thank you so much!” He replied sincerely, smiling at his friends. Alex and Hank had surprised him by tricking out his wheels with rainbow flags that spun as he rolled. He really did like it and was considering keeping them on all year round. Maybe it would help him accept himself a little more. 

This celebration was much larger than Charles had anticipated, and he felt his heart speed up a couple of beats. There were so many people wearing flags as capes and showing off their pride in their genders and sexualities, but Charles felt pangs of anxiety. What if he was out of place among his own kind? What if he didn’t fit in? What if Hank and Alex thought less of him? 

“I printed out a map for each of us,” Hank said, pulling them out of his bag and handing them out. Charles glanced over it, seeing that there was a whole food section, as well as one for animals. Hopefully kids would enjoy those. There was even an 18+ section. God knows that would hold. 

“Is there anywhere in particular you guys wanna go?” 

“I don’t know about you, but I wanna check out the adult section. It was wicked last year,” Alex laughed, and Hank blushed. 

“You guys should go ahead,” Charles said with a smile, wanting the lover boys to have their alone time. “I’ll meander around and catch up with you later?” 

“Are you sure, Charles? We want to spend time with you too!” 

“Have some fun and then hang out with me! I want you guys to have ‘couple time’ too.” 

“Okay. Hank will have his ringer on though, if you need absolutely anything. Wanna meet by the mini doughnut cart over there at 4?” 

“Perfect, see you then!”

Charles watched his friends disappear into the throng of people before orienting himself with the map Hank had given him. It was honestly pretty overwhelming, and he didn’t know where to begin. There were vendors galore, as well as organizations touting their LGBTQ-friendly missions, and Charles felt a little wary about the big corporations advertising there. It seemed fake, but he brushed it aside for the time being. He was here to enjoy himself, to enjoy being a queer mutant. 

He carefully made his way through the crowd, careful to avoid toes and ankles with his wheelchair. He stopped at a couple of vendors and briefly considered buying himself a full pansexual flag, but he got nervous and settled on a ‘he/him’ pronoun button and a pansexual button, which he timidly pinned to his t-shirt. Though he was sure almost everyone at Columbia - faculty, staff, and students alike - suspected he wasn’t straight, it felt odd to finally admit to a hoard of strangers he was queer. His mother didn’t even know. 

Charles continued to roll along, gazing at the people just as much as the merchandise. Everyone was thrilled to be there, flaunting their identities with rightful joy. Charles wished he could feel better about his own sexuality and mutation, but there was so much conditioned shame, he felt wrong being around all this happiness. Maybe there was a mutant solidarity tent or something that he could go to. He glanced at the map and was surprised to discover there was a mutant pride tent,  _ and  _ it was close by! 

Weaving his way through the mob of people, he found the tent after a few wrong turns. It was much larger than he expected, and there were several people seated at a table, chatting with each other. His heart raced as he neared the booth, and he worried about not being able to talk with anyone. 

“Hi,” One of the people at the table greeted him. The speaker was a tall masculine person with storm grey eyes. Charles’ heart skipped a beat. “How are you?” 

“Oh hello, I’m doing alright. A bit overwhelmed as this is my first time at pride,” he replied nervously, wheeling a bit closer to stay out of the way of the crowds. 

“Well, I’m glad you came over to see us. I’m Erik Lehnsherr - he, she, or they is fine.’” 

“I’m Charles, um, he/him pronouns.”

“Nice to meet you, Charles, I like your wheels!” 

“Aw, thank you. My friends did them for me. Wanted to make me stand out a little.” 

“Are you a mutant as well?” Erik questioned, looking over to his friends behind the table. 

“Mhm, I’m a telepath actually.” 

“That’s rad! I’m metallokinetic myself. Emma here is a telepath, Storm can manipulate the weather, and Kurt can teleport.” 

“That’s so cool! Pleasure to meet you all.” 

“Do you want a pin? We’re selling them technically, but since it’s your first time, I want you to have one on us,” Erik said, holding out a pin that read ‘Mutant & Proud’ in block letters. 

“I’d love one, thank you,” he said, happily taking the button and pinning it to his shirt below the pansexual flag. 

“It looks good on you!”

“T-thank you!” Charles felt his cheeks flushing, and he cursed Erik for being so cute and himself for being so easy to swoon. He didn’t know anything about this person! “What exactly is your organization or group?” 

“We’re a collection of professionals who started a support group for mutants in the area. We’re called ‘Mutants United.’ We have a subgroup that works with kids and parents, and they’ve got their own tent across the park.” 

“That’s amazing! I can’t believe I haven’t heard of you guys before. Are you affiliated to any colleges or anything?” 

“Nope, but we’re working to expand our network. I’m a social worker, Emma is a lawyer, Storm’s at college in Arizona, and Kurt is a deacon, so we’ve got influence in a lot of different circles.” 

“Wow! I just started teaching at Columbia, in the biology department. I’m the specialist on mutation.” 

“No way, you’re Charles Xavier?” The blonde woman, Emma, asked. 

“That’s me,” he replied with a small smile. 

“We were actually just talking about your work earlier! It’s lovely to meet you!” 

“Likewise! I didn’t know anyone outside academia actually knew of me.” 

“You’re only one of the most important researchers in the field! Of course, we know you.” 

“Ah, well,” Charles stammered, filled with humility. 

“Would you like to hang out with us?” Erik asked. “I know you just met us, but we’d love to connect with you.” 

“I’d love to, but I’m supposed to be meeting my friends in just a little bit. Are you all gonna be around tomorrow? I wasn’t planning on coming down again, but I’d really like to get to know other mutants.” 

“Of course! We’ll be here till 7 tonight and from 10 to 8 tomorrow, if you wanna stop by. But here’s our card in case you don’t make it tomorrow. And hell, why not have my phone number too,” Erik grinned, quickly jotting their number on a sticky note and handing it to Charles. “Text me whenever, and we’ll find a time to talk.” 

“Thank you all so much, it’s been so nice to meet you,” he said as he unlocked his wheels. 

“Same here,” Erik said with a shark-like smile. “Have a great night.” 

“Thanks! You too!” 

Charles rolled away, his cheeks burning. He’d met other mutants who knew about his work and immediately accepted him! He got the vibes that Erik thought he was cute too, and that made his heart twist. He’d been unsuccessful at dating in the past, preferring to focus on his education and work before his personal happiness. Moira had been an exception, but that had ended disastrously. That relationship was the first time he’d admitted to himself he was pansexual, and he’d tried to date men after her, but nothing worked out. Alex and Hank were going to tease the hell out of him for getting a number at pride, but he didn’t care. Maybe this could be something special. 

He made his way to the mini donut cart where he saw Hank and Alex sitting on a bench, their backpacks bulging with merch and goodies. 

“Hey guys!” Charles called, waving before rolling up in front of them.    
“Hi Charles, what’s up?” Alex asked with his cheeky smile. “Did you have fun?” 

“I did! I got a number actually, from someone at Mutants United.”

“Really?” Hank exclaimed, looking up from his donut. “That’s great! What’s their name?” 

“Erik. They’re really cute,” Charles said quietly. “They use any pronouns, so you can call them he, she, or they.” 

“Oh my gosh, that’s awesome! Are you gonna text them?” 

“I think so.” 

“Do it now!” Alex said excitedly. “Maybe you can get out tonight, have some fun for once.” 

“I don’t know… I don’t wanna seem desperate or anything.” 

“C’mon, you know you want to.” 

“You got this, Charles,” Hank chimed in, and Charles sighed, rolling his eyes. He took out his phone and Erik’s number and crafted a message as Hank and Alex looked over his shoulder. 

CX: Hi Erik, this is Charles Xavier! I was wondering if you’d maybe like to grab dinner or something at some point :) 

“Does that sound good? Not too flirty or anything?” Charles asked, looking to his compatriots for reassurance. 

“Send that sucker, dude,” Alex replied. “Then we’ll go get your flag.”

Charles’ finger hovered over the send button, and he swallowed. He felt like he was in high school all over again. But he sent it, shoving his phone back into his cargo pocket. Now he had to wait. 

He was hot and overwhelmed by the time they got done wandering around pride. Hank went to get them all water, and Charles pulled out his phone to check for messages. His heart fluttered when he saw Erik had replied. 

EL: Hey! So glad to hear from you. My shift here ends soon, and I’d like to get out of sweaty clothes before going anywhere. Would meeting up at 8:30 work? Where would you like to meet?

CX: 8:30 would be great! Do you drink? We could meet at Weston Station if you do. If not, there are plenty of coffee shops around! 

Hank came back, and Charles shared the news with his friends. He felt giddy and excited, even if this wasn’t a date. It was contact with another LGBTQ mutant who happened to be incredibly pretty, and he was over the moon. 

*****

Charles went back to the apartment he shared with his friends and began to get nervous. He showered, then checked his phone. 

EL: I’m trying to get sober actually, so avoiding bars would be great - thanks for asking. Do you know where Grey Dove Cafe is? It’s one of my favorite mutant-owned businesses, and they’re open crazy hours for pride. 

CX: Sweet, Grey Dove at 8:30 it is! Can’t wait! 

“Hank,” Charles called down the hall to his friend’s room. “Do you think you could drive me somewhere in about 15 minutes?” 

“Sure,” he replied, poking his head out of the bedroom. “Going to see your new friend?” 

“Thank you! And yeah! I don’t think I’ll be out too late, but if I am, I’ll just call a cab.” 

“I’ll have my phone on me, so don’t hesitate to call if you need to get out, okay?” 

“Thanks,” he smiled, rolling into his room to get dressed. He didn’t know what the night would hold, but he’d bring the essentials for an evening out. 

*****

Charles’ palms were sweating as Hank pulled away from the cafe. He carefully wheeled himself into the shop, and almost immediately, he spotted Erik at one of the tables, looking at their phone. They were wearing a short floral dress, and Charles’ breath caught in his throat. He was even more nervous when Erik waved to him, and he noticed that they had pulled out the chair for him, so he could fit his wheelchair up to the table. 

“Hi,” he said as he rolled into the place Erik had made for him. “Thanks so much for moving the chair for me. It’s really thoughtful of you.” 

“No problem,” they replied with an easy smile. “I just wanted to make sure you could get in okay.” 

“Thanks!” Charles was sure Erik could see he was blushing, and he gently extended his mind to feel their energy. Their mind was open and excited, and Charles felt the butterflies that fluttered in their stomach.  _ Are they into me? _ “You look super cute by the way. I love the dress!” 

“Oh wow!” Now it was Erik’s turn to blush. “Thank you!” 

“Can I buy you a coffee or tea or something?”  _ Gotta show them you’re responsible!  _

“You don’t have to pay,” they protested, but Charles insisted. 

“Please, it’s my pleasure.” 

“Could I have a mango smoothie?” They asked, looking a little nervous. 

“You got it!” Charles said with a smile and rolled up to the counter. 

Thankfully the service was fast, and the worker carried the drinks over for him, setting them gently on the table. Erik took their smoothie and beamed. 

“Thank you so much!” 

“Not a problem at all. You treated me to pin, so it’s only fair. Please, tell me more about yourself, if you wouldn’t mind. I think you know a bit more about me than I do about you.”

“Oh goodness,” Erik laughed, running a hand through their short auburn hair. “Let’s see. I’m a social worker, but you already knew that. I mostly work with kids, which can be really hard. I’ve never been married, but I’d like to be one day. I’m an only child, and my parents are my biggest supporters, which I know is super rare for people like us. My mom actually made me this dress because I had a hard time finding something that would fit me right. I’m originally from Germany, but we moved when I was young, so I don’t remember the country too well. I grew up speaking the language, and I had an accent for a while. I majored in psychology in college, and I was on the school’s swim team for two years.”

“I’m really glad your parents accept you, that’s a lifesaver. Your mom is an amazing seamstress, I thought your dress was store bought.” 

“I’ll tell her you said so! What about you? I know about your professional life a little bit, but nothing about you personally besides what you told me earlier.” 

“Well, I’m a Cancer if you’re into astrology,” Charles joked, and Erik grinned, nodding. “Um, I’m from New York, but I basically grew up at boarding school in London. I have a sister, Raven, who is an actress and activist out in San Francisco. I live with my colleague Hank McCoy and his partner, Alex, which is an interesting arrangement to say the least. Let’s see, what else? Oh, never been married either, but I was briefly engaged to a woman I met during my time at Oxford. That ended poorly, but it’s for the best.” 

“You’re pretty well travelled then?” Erik asked, twirling their straw between their fingers. 

“I guess so,” Charles nodded. “I travelled a lot with my parents when I was younger. My dad was a leading nuclear scientist, so we went all over the world.” 

“That’s awesome! What’s your favorite place you’ve been?” 

“I loved New Zealand. It was gorgeous.” 

“I’ve never been, but all the pictures I’ve seen have been spectacular!” 

“Have you done any adventuring around the world?”

“Only from Germany to here and then to Mexico, which I loved.” 

“Mexico is beautiful!”    
“So, why haven’t you come to pride before? How long have you been at Columbia?” 

“Well, if I’m gonna be completely honest, I’ve been afraid,” Charles confessed, staring into his teacup. “I think I have some internalized homophobia that I need to deal with. I’ve also been nervous about telling people I’m a mutant. I’ve been at Columbia for two years now, and barely anyone knows about either aspect of my life. Of course, people suspect and probably already know from things I’ve let slip.” 

“Gotcha,” Erik nodded, their brow slightly furrowed. “I know it’s really difficult to tell people those things, and I’m grateful you opened up to me.” 

“Thank you.” 

“You’re pan, right?” 

“Yeah! What about you?” 

“I suppose I’m technically pansexual, but I usually just say queer. Gender isn’t a huge thing for me in attraction.” 

“What is your gender, if you don’t mind me asking?” 

“That’s a great question,” Erik laughed. “Some days I don’t even know. Somewhere between genderfluid and genderqueer, so under the trans umbrella.” 

“Okay, cool. I’ve never met someone on that part of the gender spectrum before - to my knowledge anyway!” 

“There’s a first for everything,” Erik said with a grin.  _ Were they flirting?  _

“I’m glad it was you. You’re really nice,” Charles replied, fighting to keep from looking away from Erik. He was nervous again. 

“Thanks, I try! You are too!” 

They stayed talking for almost 2 hours before Erik pointed out the shop was closing soon. 

“Do you need to head home?” Charles asked, fingers drumming the rim of his empty mug. This had been such an amazing time, and he didn’t want it to end. But he knew Erik had an early morning tomorrow with the booth at the festival. 

“Yeah, I probably should,” they replied sadly. “I don’t want to though. I really like spending time with you.” 

“I do too. We should do it regularly! I don’t think my head can handle another day at pride, but I’d love to grab coffee again later in the week, if that works for you.” 

“Perfect,” Erik nodded with a genuine smile. “Can I drive you home?” 

“That’d be amazing! Thank you,” Charles replied, and they headed off together into the summer night.

*****

Charles had had meals and drinks with Erik every weekend since Pride, and he had only recently admitted to himself (and Hank and Alex) that they may become a couple soon. Erik had been dropping subtle hints for weeks that they should be official, but Charles was nervous. He’d never felt so intensely that he wanted to be with someone, even Moira, and it scared him. He knew Erik wouldn’t judge him, but he was afraid to move to the next stage because of the possibility of physical intimacy. It’s not that he thought himself unworthy or unable, there was just no possibility of spontaneity with his paralysis. Everything needed to be calculated and careful, and he feared that Erik wouldn’t want to take on his limitations. Maybe he’d ask them pointblank one day. But he had to get ready to meet them tonight. They were coming to pick him and take him to their place for the first time, and he wanted everything to go smoothly. 

On-street parking was difficult to come by, so Erik walked to the front of Charles’ apartment building and waited for him there. 

“Hi there,” Charles said, rolling towards Erik from the side ramp. 

“Hi handsome,” Erik replied, leaning down to hug him. They were wearing their one of their favorite “femme” outfits - a light blue dress over denim shorts and high socks. Charles thought they looked stunning, but the words caught in his throat. “Are you ready to head to my house?” 

“Absolutely, lead the way!” 

The air was still humid and warm, and as he followed his friend, Charles wished he had the confidence to wear shorts like them. It wasn’t that he hated his legs (at least not as much as he used to), it was the thoughts of others that constantly vibrated in his head that scared him into always wearing pants. The comments were usually of pity, and that was one thing Charles hated. 

“I’d ask to hold your hand, but I think that’d be like taking one oar from a rowboat,” Erik joked as they crossed the street to the parking garage where they had parked. Charles grinned and nodded. 

“I’d love to hold your hand once we get in the car,” Charles said softly, watching Erik’s dress sway as they walked. It was almost hypnotic the way the fabric rippled and folded with their steps. 

“Sounds good to me! Would it be best for you if I backed out and then helped you get in? That way we would have more room for you to maneuver.” 

“That’d be amazing, thank you!” 

Extending his mind just a little as Erik started their car, Charles saw no pity at all in Erik’s thoughts, just practicality and excitement.  _ You can’t fuck this up.  _ He thought to himself as Erik opened their door to come help him into the car. 

“I don’t remember how you usually do this,” Erik admitted a little nervously. “But just tell me what I can do to help.” 

“I can typically get in myself using the handle above the door, I just can’t quite reach,” he replied, smiling to ease Erik’s mind. 

“Hold on a second, I have an idea!” 

Charles felt his chair rising into the air very slowly until he was able to reach the handle. Quickly, he was able to undo his seatbelt and shift from his wheelchair into the car, and by the time he looked at Erik, they had already figured out how to collapse his wheelchair and were putting it in the backseat. 

“That was so cool,” Charles said as Erik got into their seat. “It was like a baby rollercoaster!” 

“I’m glad you thought so! I was worried you’d be scared,” they replied as the car rolled forward. “No, I love seeing people’s mutations. It’s always so interesting!” 

“I’m glad!” 

Erik’s apartment was about 45 minutes outside of the city, and Charles was getting more nervous with every mile. He’d only known Erik two months, but he felt a strong connection to them. He wanted to spend more time together and get closer to them, whatever that entailed. 

“Here we are,” Erik said, turning into a small parking lot in front of a red brick building. It had cheery little street lamps lining the walkway and beautiful beds of flowers out front. 

“Looks lovely!” Charles said as Erik pulled out his wheelchair and helped guide him out the car. 

“Thank you! My apartment is gonna be a little messy, by the way. But there should be room on the floor for your wheelchair. If not, we’ll find a way to get you through.” 

“You’re really thoughtful,” Charles said as he followed Erik into the building. “Do you have disabled family or friends?” 

“I do try. My grandma has been in a wheelchair most of her life, so I’ve gotten used to thinking about things in terms of accessibility.” 

“That’s really amazing to hear. People forget about it a lot, especially out in public.” 

“I’m not gonna forget,” Erik said, grinning as they exited the elevator, and Charles rolled down the hallway after his friend. 

They led him to one of the many dark grey doors and opened it, holding the door open so Charles could roll inside. It was sparsely decorated, but spacious and clean (with a few boxes on the floor), and Charles felt his anxiety flaring up again as the door shut. What if Erik wanted to have sex? Charles knew it was a possibility, and though he told himself he’d worry about it when the time came, the list of preparations was running through his mind. 

“I haven’t had anyone new over for a long time,” Erik said, setting their handbag on the dining room table. “Let me show you where everything is. This is the living room and dining room, and the kitchen is right over there. I usually eat dinner at the counter, but my mother insisted that I have a proper table for ‘guests.’” 

Charles gazed over the room, taking in the details. Having an eidetic memory had it perks when it came to remembering where things were. 

“The guest bathroom is right over here, off the kitchen. My bedroom is through that door there, and my office is in this room here.” 

“It’s really nice! I love the color scheme,” Charles said sincerely, admiring the greys and greens Erik had chosen for his space. It was calming. 

“Thanks! My mom helped me,” they replied. “Would you like anything to drink or eat? You’re welcome to anything in the fridge or cabinets. I don’t have any alcohol, but I have several types of sparkling water and juice. Do you mind if I change real quick?” 

“Go ahead! I’ll explore the fridge,” Charles smiled, waiting until Erik disappeared into their bedroom to wheel into the kitchen. It was a little bit of a tight fit, but he managed to roll up to the fridge and look around. Erik wasn’t lying when they said they had  _ several  _ types of water - the boxes filled the bottom half of the fridge. He was a little worried about having to pee if he drank something, but he settled on a peach-flavored water and made his way to the dining room/living room. There were a few pictures scattered around the room, and he rolled up to one and grinned when he saw baby Erik with his grandmother (he assumed because of her wheelchair). 

“That was my third birthday,” Erik said from behind him, and Charles jumped a little, not expecting to be caught looking at the photos. “Mama gave me that to use as a conversation starter.” 

“You were adorable!” Charles exclaimed, looking more closely at the picture. “Not that you’re not now.” Erik had changed into a cute tank top and gym shorts, and Charles’ nerves were crying. Erik was so attractive, and his heart raced as he noticed that Erik was blushing. 

“Aah, thank you!” 

“It’s just true.” 

Erik shook their head, sitting down on the couch across from Charles. 

“It is,” Charles insisted, and Erik bit their lip, looking up with wide eyes. 

“You really think so?” 

“I do! How could I not?” 

“I don’t know… Some people think I’m cute until they see how my gender presentation changes and learn about my dysphoria and stuff.” 

“It doesn’t bother me at all. I think you look amazing any way you dress.” 

“I know you’re pansexual, but have you ever… been with anyone like me?” 

“Honestly, I haven’t. I’ve mostly dated cisgender women. I had one relationship with a cis man, but we never progressed past casually seeing each other.” 

“Okay,” Erik nodded, looking a little scared. “Do you think we could make something work?” 

“Like romantically?” Now Charles was worried, but he felt there was something different, special, and important about Erik. 

“Mhm. Or beyond.” 

“I think we could certainly manage,” Charles said quietly. “I can’t reach your hands, could you lean forward?” 

“Oh sure,” Erik obliged, and Charles took their hands in his. Their skin was warm, and their hands fit well in Charles’. 

“Are you scared?” 

“I don’t know. Yes and no? I’m just scared about screwing things up.” 

“I feel the same way. I think this could be special, and I’m worried I’ll ruin things.” 

“Well, I don’t think that’ll happen. I’d like to try.” 

Charles swallowed nervously and slowly rolled forward, so that Erik was more touchable. He kissed each of their hands gently and looked up into their stormy eyes. 

“You’re really pretty,” Charles murmured, lacing his fingers through theirs. 

“Can I kiss you?” Erik asked, squeezing Charles’ hands. 

“I’d like that,” he replied, and Erik leaned forward, kissing him very tentatively. Charles mentally pushed his appreciation into the other’s mind, and Erik didn’t pull away, deepening the embrace slightly. 

“Was that okay?” they questioned as they separated, eyes fixated on Charles’ face. 

“It was beautiful.” 

“Um, would you like to go to my bedroom? We totally don’t have to do anything at all. It’s just pretty comfy, and you could get out of your chair for a bit.” 

“Sure!” Charles nodded, allowing Erik to get up and lead him. “If we do wind up wanting to… you know… I’ll have to do some prepping in the bathroom.” 

“Okay, would you need any help?” 

“I’m not sure. I don’t think so, but I may end up needing some if I have difficulties.” 

“Not a problem. I got you.” 

“Thank you. I might go and prepare just in case. Do you think you might want to have sex?” 

“I think so. If that’s something you’d like too.” 

“I would,” Charles said a little nervously. “We’ll have to communicate to make sure we’re both comfortable, but I really like you. I’m sorry I’m so awkward right now….” 

“I like you too. You’re not awkward! You’re… different. Not in a bad way at all, in a good way! Like you make me feel really fluttery and happy.” 

“I’m glad! Let me go get ready, and I’ll meet you back here?” 

“Perfect! Please use my bathroom, it’s bigger and easier to maneuver in. I’ll use the guest one.” 

“Thank you, Erik,” Charles said, rolling into the bathroom. His heart was beating a thousand miles per hour, and he was terrified about Erik finding him unattractive. The truth was he had only had sex once since he was paralyzed, and he’d ended up crying afterward because of the thoughts his partner had accidentally projected. Pity and resentment didn’t paint a pretty picture… 

Charles breathed deeply and slowly began to undo his trousers. He hated that after all these years he was still embarrassed when people learned he used a catheter. He supposed it was no one’s business really, but it was a bit hard to hide from sexual partners. He’d opted for a suprapubic one, which was a little easier to manage on his own, and Erik wouldn’t necessarily have to see or touch it, if Charles got his pants off. But he still had to undo his collection bag, empty it, and put it in his backpack, which made him extraordinarily anxious. His GP was a real gem, and she always tried to reassure him that sex involved fluids of all kinds, and even if it did leak, it would be okay. Hopefully it wouldn’t scare Erik off… 

He gently cleaned his nether parts with wipes he had brought and put on some extra deodorant just to be safe. He was actually able to get his slacks up in a timely fashion, and he quietly exited the bathroom after washing his hands thoroughly. 

“Hi,” Erik said, sitting cross-legged on their bed. They looked flushed and anxious, so Charles smiled broadly at them, hoping to reassure them. 

“Hey,” he replied, rolling up to them. “Are you nervous? I’ll answer any questions you have before we start if you’d like.” 

“I am,” they nodded. “I just haven’t done this in a while, and I’m scared that I'll hurt you or make you uncomfortable…” 

“Don’t worry about that, I’m not fragile. I’ve gotten pretty good at expressing my needs, so I’ll tell you if something isn’t right, okay?” 

“Promise?” 

“Of course, if you do the same. I want to know how to honor your body and needs as well.” 

“Thank you,” Erik said with a small smile. “I just get nervous when it comes to this stuff. Please don’t take any offense to this, but I’m a little afraid of cis men. It’s not you, it’s just the experiences I’ve had.” 

“I can certainly sympathize, and I’m so sorry you’ve had to deal with ignorance or violence in the past. Let me know what you need from me - like how I should address your parts and stuff, okay? I’m really sorry that this can’t be more spontaneous… Sex takes a little explaning and preparation when you’re in a wheelchair…” 

“Don’t worry about that at all. We will go slow and adapt as we go along. I’m a quick learner!” 

Charles grinned and kissed Erik’s hands again. They were going to be fine. 

“So, I do have to be very honest about it - I’m a little limited in the things I can do…” 

“Tell me,” Erik said calmly, running their fingers over Charles’ knee. “We’ll work around anything. I just want you to feel good.” 

“Well, um, I can’t really, um, get it up… I don’t have any feeling below my waist, but there are two spots on my thighs that are very sensitive for some unknown reason.” 

“Got it, okay,” they nodded, making a mental note. “Do you want me to avoid touching you where you can’t feel it? Is that weird for you?” 

“Not necessarily. I’ve been told I could have phantom sensations, so just let me know if you’re touching me if I can’t see.” 

“Sure thing.” 

“This is a bit more embarrassing for me, but I, well, I do have a, um, catheter… I’ve taken the bag off, and I didn’t drink too much, so it should be okay… I’m just really sensitive about it.” 

“Okay, not a problem. I won’t mention it unless absolutely necessary, how’s that?” 

“Thank you. That’s really nice.” 

“It’s just basic decency,” Erik replied, shaking their head. “What are the best places to touch you?” ” 

“I think my neck and my chest, and those two areas on my thighs.” 

“How do you feel about penetrative sex? Is that something you’d be interested in or comfortable with?” 

“Um, I-I don’t know. I don’t think I’d be able to feel it, but I’ve never tried. I’d probably rather not.” 

“That’s perfectly fine! I understand completely.” 

“What should I know about  _ you _ before we try anything?” 

“Good question. I do have some dysphoria around my bottom half, but it’s not super bad right now. I don’t really have a preference for what you call it, but that may change. I love hickies, especially around my waist and neck, those are super hot areas for me. My nipples are pretty sensitive as well.” 

“Okay,” Charles replied, quickly scanning Erik’s body with his eyes. They were slender but well-built, with muscle that shaped them beautifully. “I think I’m ready, if you are.” 

“I think I am too,” they said, hopping off the bed. “Can I help you into bed?” 

“Yes, thank you.” 

Charles undid his seat belt, and Erik gently wrapped their arms around Charles and lifted him effortlessly onto the bed, propping him up among the pillows. Charles smiled through his anxiety and motioned for Erik to join him. 

“Would it be sexy for me to help you take your clothes off?” they asked, and Charles nodded, feeling his stomach twisting and turning. Erik carefully slipped off Charles’ shoes and looked up at him. 

“Come here a second,” Charles said, and when Erik complied, he pulled them into a deep kiss. Erik moaned softly as Charles ran his hands underneath their tank top, and he projected his desire and attraction towards Erik, who beamed as they pulled away for air. 

“Thank you,” they murmured, settling on the bed next to Charles. “I needed that. I’m feeling a little less nervous.” 

“Good! That’s my goal. I want you to be comfortable.” 

“Are  _ you _ ?” 

“I’m getting there,” Charles admitted. “Still scared you’re not going to find me attractive…” 

“Well, how about we get your clothes off, and I’ll show you how attractive I think you are?” 

“O-okay.” 

Erik gently leaned over him and undid his trousers, pulling them off slowly, revealing Charles’ favorite checkered boxers. Charles felt his cheeks heating up as his bedmate’s hands drifted into no man’s land, beyond the knowledge of his adapted nervous system, and exposed Charles’ parts to the air. He faintly remembered the sensation of freeing himself from his clothes and letting the air caress his lower body, and he tried to focus on the feeling and make his nerves remember. 

“You’re so handsome,” Erik breathed, leaning back on their haunches and admiring Charles as the other quickly undid the buttons on his own shirt, desperate to give Erik the full picture. “I think you’re stunning.” 

“R-really?” 

“Mhm,” they nodded, running their hands down Charles’ waist and legs. “I don’t think it’s fair you should be the only one naked though.” 

Erik took off their top and shorts in a slow, teasing way, and Charles wished so badly he could get hard to show Erik how badly he wanted them. But there were other things he  _ could _ do, and that’s what mattered.

Then, as if a flash of godly lightning had struck, Erik was nude before him, their penis erect and waiting. They were too gorgeous for Charles’ mind to comprehend, and he felt speechless as Erik stretched out before him, intentionally just out of reach. 

“Wow,” he managed to sputter, and Erik smiled, their cheeks blushing pink. “You’re gorgeous.” 

“No, I’m not,” they replied, scooting closer to Charles, so he could place his hands on their skin, feel their body and mind as one. 

“You  _ are! _ Look at you! Absolutely astounding.” 

“No…” 

“It’s true, please believe me. I’m a telepath, your mind and energy first called me to you. Your physical form is secondary, but my god is it beautiful, just like your psychic energy.” 

“You promise?” Erik seemed about to cry, and Charles nodded profusely, hoping he hadn’t offended them or brought up bad memories. 

“I promise,” he replied, gently guiding them into his lap. “I swear.”

“I trust you.” 

“Thank you,” Charles said gently, almost afraid to mar the moment with words. 

“Let me know if sitting on you hurts or anything, okay?” 

“Of course. I can’t really feel the weight, so don’t worry.” His fingers hovered over their skin, so close but too afraid to caress it. It was like an invisible forcefield prevented him from contact, and he wanted to pull it down. 

“Touch me. Please,” they begged, and Charles finally obliged, squeezing Erik’s waist gently and kissing their collarbones. He bit their skin very softly, and they moaned with want; hopefully, they didn’t need more than Charles could give. 

“God, you’re beautiful,” he said, looking up at Erik who was desperate for more. “May I touch lower down?” 

“Mhm,” they nodded, eyes closed but still engaged. “Please.” 

“You’re so polite.” Charles wrapped his hand around their cock, slowly pumping his fist up and down the shaft. He remembered this fondly.

“I… like begging.” 

“Oh? Is that so?” 

“Mhm, it’s embarrassing, and that gets me so hard…” 

“Okay,” Charles teased, letting go of Erik’s body and placing his hands in the air. “Beg for it.” 

“Oh fuck,” they groaned, swiveling their hips in Charles’ lap, desperate for some friction. “It’s so embarrassing.” 

“Go on, let me hear you how much you want me to fuck you.” 

“Please,” they pleaded, looking down with wide, puppy-dog eyes. “Please touch me, I need it. It’s been so long.” 

“Where should I touch you?” 

“Mm, my neck and my cock, please. You can choke me a little, if you’re okay with that.” 

“I suppose you’ve earned a little attention,” he purred, lightly running his fingers over Erik’s shaft before grabbing hold and stroking them again. He reached up with his other hand and very gently squeezed their neck, right where the carotid artery ran. They moaned loudly as Charles held them in place, and soon they warned him that they were close. 

“Oh fuck, I’m gonna cum,” they breathed, leaning forward until they could grip the headboard and completely submit to Charles’ experienced hands. “Oh god, mmm!” 

Charles’ heart was racing with arousal as Erik prepared to cum. Their back arched, and their mind projecting a million feelings and sensations. He could almost feel their pleasure as his own, and he snapped back into reality just as Erik came, semen splattering Charles’ hands and chest. The room smelled strongly of sex, and Charles grinned as Erik came down from their orgasm, looking a little shy. 

“That was amazing,” they whispered, flopping onto the bed next to Charles. “Thank you.” 

“I’m so glad it felt good! You looked like an angel,” he replied, taking their hand. 

“I feel like I looked stupid…” 

“Not in the slightest!” 

“Are you ready to try this?” 

“I think so,” Charles nodded, and Erik smiled, looking nervous but excited. 

They carefully climbed back into Charles’ lap, pulling him into a passionate kiss. Charles groaned as Erik expertly massaged his nipples, arousal prickling through his skin like fire. It wasn’t the same as before his accident, but it had become just as good with lots of self-exploration. Erik broke the kiss and winked before kissing down his neck, grazing sensitive areas with their teeth. 

“Where are the good areas on your thighs?” Erik questioned, and Charles ran his hands over the two small areas that still received neural signals. His new lover leaned down and lightly sucked the flesh, their thumb rubbing circles around Charles’ navel.

“Mmm, that feels so good,” he moaned, grasping at Erik’s broad shoulders, wishing desperately he could buck his hips into Erik’s kisses. 

“I’m so glad, I’m kinda just guessing,” they replied, before gently nipping at Charles’ neck, making him shudder. All his mental barriers were thinning, and his mind was swirling out of his head, pleasure making him feel fluid and weightless. 

He groaned as Erik pressed his buttons, arousal building up and up until he could barely form coherent words. Charles wasn’t used to losing control, but something about Erik made him trust them. They felt safe somehow, he’d have to dig deeper to truly understand it, but when Erik tongued his chest, all comprehensible thought went out the window. 

“Oh fuck, I’m -” Charles moaned, feeling his body tense up as he orgasmed, squeezing Erik’s hand tightly. “Aaah!” 

Charles felt heat rising in his cheeks when he opened his eyes to see Erik smiling at him. 

“I… I never thought I’d be able to feel so good again,” he said to them, and they grinned wider. 

“I’m so glad to be of service,” they replied, cuddling up to him. 

“Can I tell you something?” 

“Of course!” 

“I’d only had sex once before since my paralysis.” 

“Was it good?” 

“No,” Charles admitted, shaking his head. “It was really bad. I thought I’d never do it again after I heard what she was thinking about being with someone disabled…” 

“But what was wrong with how you have sex? It was phenomenal to me.” 

“I guess she was stuck in the mindset of what I  _ could  _ be doing as someone with a penis, and since I couldn’t, she was disappointed. Like I understand, but also if she really wanted to be with me, it wouldn’t matter, right? Sorry, I don’t even know why I’m talking about this…” 

“No, no, you’re right! If someone wanted to be with you, your ability to move your legs shouldn’t affect that decision.” 

“Thanks,” Charles said, sighing with embarrassment. He just wanted to fall asleep and wake up with Erik still next to him. 

“I want to be with you,” Erik whispered, and Charles’ eyes went wide. 

“Really? You do?” 

“Yeah,” they nodded, nestling their head on Charles’ shoulder. “I really like you, and I want to be your partner.” 

“I… I’d love that.”

“Perfect. Then it’s official.”

“Kiss me to seal the deal?” 

“Gladly,” Erik obliged, leaning over and kissing him gently. “Do you want to sleep over? I could help you get ready.” 

“That sounds wonderful, thank you,” Charles said. He didn’t want the moment to end, but he needed to get his collection bag hooked back up and get himself cleaned off. He didn’t think he could shower here, especially not without help, so he’d probably just towel himself off. 

“Are you going to be okay if I take a shower real quick? I don’t want to leave if you’re not comfortable,” Erik asked after they’d cuddled for a little bit. 

“Of course! Please go ahead,” Charles nodded. “Could you pass me my backpack?” 

“Sure!” They climbed off the end of the bed, passed it to him, and kissed his forehead before padding off the shower. 

Charles reattached his collection bag, breathing a small sigh of relief that his catheter hadn’t leaked (that he could tell anyway). Getting dressed was always more difficult than getting undressed, and he hoped Erik would take their time in the shower, so they didn’t see him struggle. Thankfully, he had planned ahead and brought a set of pajamas with him, just in case Erik had invited him to stay the night. He never anticipated that they would have had sex though. 

Wiping off his chest and getting his shirt on was the easy part, but he wrestled with his boxers and lounge pants. He was used to dressing in his own bed, which was complete with a railing and handhold to make it easier. He felt tears coming when he almost flipped himself off the bed trying to get them on, and suddenly Erik was by his side. 

“Can I help?” They asked softly, and Charles nodded, a few tears escaping his eyes. Erik gently lifted Charles and helped him pull up his pajamas before setting him back down. 

“It’s okay, shhh,” they soothed, holding Charles close to their chest as he wiped away tears. “There’s nothing to worry about. I promise.” 

“I’m sorry… I don’t know why it really got to me…” Charles said, sniffing. 

“That’s totally fine. There doesn’t always have to be a reason. Just know I’m here to help and love you, okay?”

“Thank you so much, Erik, I really appreciate everything you do for me.” 

“I just love you,” they replied simply, gently stroking Charles’ hair and smiling at him. 

“I love you too,” Charles said, pressing himself closer into Erik’s arms. 

“You ready for bed? Do you wanna brush your teeth or anything?” 

“Yeah, that’s probably a good idea.”

Erik helped Charles into his chair, and the two of them tidied up in the bathroom. 

“You should have a toothbrush for here too,” Erik said, pulling an extra out one from a drawer on Charles’ right. “I’ll put it right next to mine where you can reach it, okay? Yours is green.” 

“Thank you,” Charles managed, blushing at the gesture. “That’s really kind.” 

“You deserve it.” 

Charles smiled and followed Erik to their bed. No one had treated him like this. Erik knew he was a mutant, queer,  _ and _ disabled, and it didn’t seem to change anything. He didn’t have to be anyone but himself around Erik. They were an open book. When he found himself in his new partner’s bed, Charles felt that he truly belonged with Erik. They exuded love for life and confidence in themself and in their path, and Charles longed for that energy. Maybe if he stuck around, some would rub off. Only time would tell. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! As always, I'm super grateful for your attention and support! :) <3


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